That is one beautiful Colorado hawk! We see them flying around here every day, and sometimes they land on the tops of our big Austrian pine trees. We back up to open space, so they love to hunt for snakes and mice here, which we appreciate greatly! That is quite a question the Lord asked Job! After everything Job suffered, the Lord speaks to him in chapters 38-41. The Lord asks him a series of amazing questions that reveal God’s sovereignty over all of creation. I am writing this today because I needed to be reminded to trust in the Lord and I want to share how He did that.
I have been struggling with discouragement, so this morning the Lord brought to mind a familiar verse that He has used to speak to me many times. This is what I heard:
“Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.”
Psalm 43:5
When God speaks to my heart like that I stop, listen, and have a conversation with Him. I let Him know how I am feeling and I give Him my heart. He already knows right where we are at in life and He already knows every issue we are struggling with in our hearts, so it is best to be honest with Him.
The Lord has been speaking to me about trusting Him and putting my hope in Him for the last couple weeks. He knows I have been discouraged about many things regarding this disease and what it has done to my life. When I saw the photo of the hawk this morning, I looked up verses about hawks and God led me to the Book of Job. He has used Job many times since I was diagnosed with Celiac on 1-6-2012. Indeed I felt like Job for many years during the worst of my suffering. I felt like Job and Hezekiah.
I have had more tough conversations with God than I’d like to admit over the last 6 years and 10 months. I have asked God many hard questions, some of which I still don’t have answers to. I was angry for a long time and just like Job I despised the day I was born. I was angry at being created at all. Even after the experiences with the demon, God’s angels, and the Holy Spirit miracle where God let me live, sometimes that anger and hurt still rise up and I wish I had never been born. However, through the power of the Holy Spirit I rise up higher and praise God for giving me life!
Suffering is not something any of us want to go through, but I must trust that He is sovereign over every part of my life just as He is sovereign over all of creation. That is what the verse about the hawk says to me. It is not my wisdom that causes the hawk to take flight and spread his wings to the south. It is God’s wisdom that does such things in His creation!
God loves us and He cares for us even when we don’t understand. Even when we are hurting and angry. God carries us and comforts us with His great wisdom and love! Yes, I feel broken. My heart is broken. My body is broken. But I am strong in Christ! My life will never be the same again, I know that, but I also know the plans God has for me are going to be more than all I could ask or imagine.
Like Job, I must trust the Lord despite the loss. Despite the loss of health, despite the loss of employment and income, and despite the loss of strength. I have questioned God way too much during my time of suffering and I have said things in anger that I had to repent for many times. I praise Him that He is slow to anger and we can approach Him with freedom and confidence. If not, I would have been struck down a long time ago! Praise the Lord for His grace and mercy through Jesus!
My heart feels as Job’s did when He replied to the Lord’s questions:
“I know that you can do all things; no plan of yours can be thwarted. You asked, ‘Who is this that obscures my counsel without knowledge?’ Surely I spoke of things I did not understand, things too wonderful for me to know.”
Job 42:2-3
“You said, ‘Listen now, and I will speak; I will question you, and you shall answer me.’ My ears had heard of you but now my eyes have seen you. Therefore I despise myself and repent in dust and ashes.”
Job 42:4-6
May the Lord accept that from my heart as well and may the Lord’s will be done!
I am nothing! Jesus Christ is Lord!
Grace and peace to you all!
Ryan Callahan's Blog 
Ryan, this is a powerful piece. Wow. I appreciate your honesty, faith and faithfulness despite the suffering you have endured. I am sorry for all the pain and loss you have experienced. However, please know this…it makes your faith all the more inspiring, your words ring even louder, your message more believable. God is giving you a different platform and probably a more powerful platform through your illness. I’m truly sorry it has gone this way. But you are a shining light in this dark world despite all of it. The way God answered Job has always caused me to stop and wonder. God is basically saying, “Who do you think you are?” Sometimes we do need to be reminded that God is God and we are not. We will not understand all things until we stand before Him. When I can’t see God’s love in my particular circumstances, I repeat this verse over and over:
Romans 5:8 – But God demonstrates His own love for us in this, while we were yet sinners Christ died for us.
No matter what, we have already seen and experienced the fullness of God’s love in Jesus. This may not change my circumstances, but it can change my heart. Thank you for this awesome message and amazing photo! God bless you!
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Thank you Melissa! I really appreciate that and what you said is a blessing to my heart! God bless you!
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It’s hard to trust, when we don’t have all the answers 😁😁 but that’s exactly what trusting calls for, isn’t it? Believing that we serve a good God; a faithful and understanding God. May the Lord see you through this time
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Amen! Thank you!
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Ryan, you are a shining light in this dark world! You have always been a shining light for me. I am in awe of your enduring faith, and I thank God for you!
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God has been so good to us and I give Him all the glory! Love ya Mom!
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This was a great post, Ryan. It reminds me of the verse that says we are changed into His image from glory to glory. It’s those times of confrontation then refreshment from God that give us the strength to go on, until the next time. But each time He accomplishes something new in us; something greater than we had before. Because each time He fills us with more of Himself as we lay our lives down. I will be praying for you brother. God’s love and blessing to you. Dee
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Amen, thank you Dee! God bless!
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Amen!
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Ryan, brother, God bless you in the midst of your difficulties! Your visits and “likes” encourage me so much and so do your faith-filled words.
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Thank you so much Maria! You encourage me too! God is so good to us! God bless you!
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Thank you, Ryan!!
🍁🐦
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Hang in there, Ryan! I will be praying for you. I’m sharing these verses in my post for Thursday, but take a look at Jeremiah 17:7-8 when you get the chance. The heart times do come, but God’s Spirit gives us the ability to blossom despite the pain. I concur with the other commenters on this post – your blog is a light for the Lord, and you are likely ministering to far more people than you may realize. God is using you! ✝️
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Thank you sister! I appreciate those verses, amen! Glory to God! God bless you!
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I hope you start to feel a little better, Ryan. Thanks for letting your light shine.
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Ryan,
Keep doing great things for God’s Kingdom! It is hard to understand things from our perspective, but God sees the entire story and with you He is writing a great one!
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That is very humbling and encouraging! Praise the Lord! Thanks for the encouragement brother! It’s awesome to see how the Lord uses us all! All glory to God! Thank you Jesus!
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Amen Ryan! Keeping Fighting the good fight! Someone always needs your story.
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Ryan,
One thing that strikes me with your posts when you share your suffering is that there are others who have suffered as well and that they can relate to you. Your writing is helping them to see that they are not alone in their suffering Your faith is encouragement to them and offers them hope. I’m reminded of the book of Esther. Who knows but what you have been called to this ministry for “such a time as this”? God is using you in a powerful way, Ryan!
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Praise God! Thank you for that good word of encouragement! May His will be done in all things! God bless you!
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Ryan, I have no words to say exactly how thankful I am that God has used you to remind other people to trust Him as he is also reminding you of the same.
It’s amazing how the sight of His creation (in your case a hawk) could trigger so many more messages from God, the key I think is for us to always pay attention even to the smallest things around us.
Please hang in there, you are inspiring other people with your strength of heart, mind and soul.
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Thank you! I appreciate the encouragement! God is awesome and I give Him all the glory! God bless you and your family!
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